4th of July

Behind every kiss I feel your hopes and dreams
And aspirations of the type of man you want to be.
What we create is our own fireworks show;
Exploding with noises, sensations, touches, and afterglows.
Theatrics and elements of our passion light up the night sky.
You and I, defy all dimensions of life.

 I feel the moisture of your lips embedded in the corners of my mind.
Those lips that trace road maps all over my body are simply divine.
My juices are flowing, as the passion is exploding.
My body quivers when I feel you growing inside of me.
I can’t speak, just thirst for more.
Pulling you in deeper to reach the walls of my shore.

 Raw and passionate; intense and magnetic.
Time blurs between visions of skin pressed tightly together.
Bed sheets spread about wherever.
Yet every time you beckon me near
I come; I come and find ecstasy there.
And time and space just disappear.

 Throbbing; I’m ready to burst into color.
I squeeze tight and find that together
We’ve discovered forever.
Laying nude in complete adoration and ecstasy.
I’m exhausted; physically and mentally spent.

My New Obsession

My lips have found the greatest pleasure in you;
That’s why I can’t keep them off of your skin.
I can’t sit here and lie to your face
Knowing behind my eyes I’m visualizing
Ripping your clothes off right this very instant.

I crave the possibilities of you.
Whenever I’m close
I feel like a driver that’s lost control.
I’m drawn in by your ambiguity
And curiously enticed by your boyish charm.
Your eyes are inviting;
That smile is ever so teasing.
All the more reason to know how well you please…

Please tell me I invade your thoughts often,
If not briefly,
I don’t want to be the only one.
Did I make you feel as good as you felt to me?
Are my kisses sweet like honey?
Did you find pleasure in the center of my
Warm delight?

I delight myself in those daydreams
That lead me to reveries of you.
Faint glimpses of soft kisses –
Our silhouettes dancing in a darkened room.
I recognize the sliver of moonlight across your face
From the drawn curtains on my window;
Even darkness cannot mask your beauty.

I am completely aware of what this is;
Please make no mistake that because
I choose to treat you so good
I’ve somehow slipped into deeper feelings.
My enchantment comes purely from the sexual pleasure we’ve shared;
For the one night we shared together.
I would like to turn this into a recurrent pleasure….
For you are the object of my new obsession…

Valentine

I took the knife to my wrist and cut across it slow and steady. Yes, it stung, it hurt; and as I looked closer I realized out poured all the words I was too scared to say to you all those years ago.

A love letter coursed through my veins for you; I bled the reality of you and I….

The Letter

The anticipation eats away at me:
I don’t know how you will react when you read those words.
Those words that I wrote for you in a love letter,
Enclosing my heart inside the seal that I kissed.
Placing a forever stamp on the envelope
Because that is where you will be in my heart –
Along with all our memories.
It’s been so long since last I saw you.

Far too often I catch myself wandering in the distance
Of thoughts consisting of you, and only you.
I debate whether or not you think of me this way.
I feel manic –
A bit obsessed –
I just can’t seem to get you out of my head.

I wrote that love letter at least 1,000 times.
Took me 13 years to finally come to terms with the truth;
Yes, I love you.
I torture myself over and over
Wondering have I missed the opportunity
Or if you’d even remember…me?

Surely you can’t be
The same person I knew so long ago.
I know I’ve changed –
I wonder if you’d even like the new me?

Each line of my letter is a heart string
That plays a specific melody for
Every year that we could have been together;
Just you and me.
I wanted you to be swept away in adoration
And truly see the tenderness of my love.
You are the epitome of my desire;
The gift I’m now longing to keep.
I didn’t realize it then, but I am aware now
That all I have ever wanted
Was to live in your arms.

Saying What I Feel

I can’t understand why my heart is so deeply in love with you
I told myself our good-byes didn’t mean anything
And now I find myself sitting here crying
Lingering on the broken promise of a future that never was
And never will be.
Well, because you’re you and
I’m me.

How did I end up here?
Why can’t I simply hate you and move on?
You’ve nestled somewhere inside me
So deeply inside that to lose you
Feels like I’m losing a limb.
I can’t breathe.
I can’t think straight.
As the tears moisten the bitterness of my heart
I feel it softly bleeding for you.

How is it you got here?
How did u get the best of me?
How did I not see it coming?
How am I in love….again.

I tremble.
What if this good-bye means forever?
The better part of me wants to scream.
Kick and scream for you to not leave.
Not leave me like all the others before.
But my pride won’t let me.
So I blink those vulnerable tears away
And smile as I hug you one last time.
I try telling myself to let go. Let go.
But I’ve never felt more safe and secure than in your arms.

I said I’d never let you see me cry
But maybe I should.
Maybe I should go out on a limb
And open my heart.
Hell, it’s already broken
What more can hurt?
Rejection, that’s what could hurt.

I’m gonna release you to your future.
And keep the memories of us alive
In the music I listen to.
And reminisce on our kisses when I feel lonely.
And revel in the fact that we were everything we could ever be in our moment
And whether our love is fleeting or lasting
I know in my heart it was real.

In Its Own Time

In due time
I believe I can share with you my heart.
But my heart has been placed in some rather calloused hands
So I’m not as open to giving myself as freely
As you may have once remembered me.
I’ve allowed the wind
To kiss many of my tears away.
It just never could erase the pain.
No, never.
And the memories don’t seem to fade
No matter how much people say
Scars diminish with time…

Whenever you put your arms around me
I can’t help feeling so weak.
It’s such a scary feeling
Being this vulnerable when I’m near you.
It’s too real for me – it’s too raw emotionally.
I’ve never shown that fragile side before to anyone.
No matter how hard I try to push you away
I miss you immediately,
Nothing feels right;
I feel incomplete.
And to my surprise you are always right there –
Right there where I left you when I ran away from what I felt inside.

I assumed all this time that you didn’t love me;
For sure you must not have cared.
You never once put up a fight for me to stay;
You never once wiped a single tear away.
I thought it cruel of you to let me go it alone
Until I realized how much I had grown on my own–
And how much you, in time, had matured, too.
At every moment I ran away
You opened your arms to free me
And I wondered, if you cared so much for me, why let me go?
How do you know that I’ll return?

I presume it’s because when
Two hearts are meant to beat as one
There is no distance that can come between –
No emotion so strong to break –
No one person whom my heart was made for

Other than your own.

An Insatiable Reverie

It began the day I found myself totally enamored with you.
The more I got to know you
The days turned into weeks, and the weeks into blurred visions of our bodies bending into sexual positions
With sheets ruffled, pillows tossed and you and I becoming…..

A reverie from which I must awaken myself.

Just to be near you my lips can’t resist the urge to kiss you.
To want to feel you so close to me that I don’t know where you end and I begin.
The urgency, the need, role playing a hot sweaty scene on my living room floor
Because we just can’t seem to make it to the bedroom door.
I want to burst into a flame of passion from your touch
Fanning myself from a fever of lust.
Feeling every kiss from your soft lips in places I won’t ever tell,
Feel you swell,
Inside of these soft places where you find escape.
Where nothing around us really matters
Except to quench the thirst that our bodies crave of one another.

Grab me firmly as I sit on my throne
Wet from anticipation feel my tremble, my violent tremble,
As I seek ecstasy in the thrust of your passion.
Heightened bliss as you pull my hair
Bite me here, no here, no there…

Don’t stop. Don’t. Ever. Stop.

I taste myself on your tongue
Knowing you can’t get enough of me.
Let my sweetness run down your fingers
As I change to a new position.
My finger nails draw a roadmap on your back
To my secret treasure.
Engulf yourself in its sweet nectar – that flow freely for you.
Let it whet your appetite although you have left mine insatiable –
In dire need, I’m damn near begging….

For just one more taste, just one more touch….another deep thrust…

As our sweaty bodies slowly grind in sync
Should I let my imagination spill over into reality?
If I beckon for you to come to me would you oblige?
I’m trying to make you call off from work so you can work me overtime.

And so I crave you in secret.
I harbor such intense feelings
I shy away from letting you know
That you’ve awakened an insatiable passion of a clandestine love whenever you’re near me.
Where my private thoughts imagine every inch of you in my mind.
I seek to invite you into my warmth where I offer you the moisture
Of heavy rainfall and rocky seas
Capsizing your boat in the deepness of me.

Let the sound of my screams of passion engulf you in my whispers of ecstasy
As I fantasize about your body against me deep, deeper baby
And feel you graze your fingers over every inch of me
So very deeply into me.
In my reverie I hear you
Saying my name; whispering my name.
Letting me know it’s been me you’ve lusted after.
Saying yes, over and over,
Because I’ve been daydreaming about our story,
Our candid encounter from the wilds of my passionate desire.
Craving only for the sweet repetition of my thoughts
Until a call, a voice, a thought brings me back into reality.