To all the mistresses and sideline hoes – Happy Valentine’s Day! The day after any holiday is always designated to you, you deserve it. I mean, after all, he or she has obligations to keep and you have such an understanding heart. That’s why they chose you; because you ‘get’ them. Unlike their significant other who nags and takes them for granted, you offer them refuge and comfort. You offer the love they can’t get at home.
But what are they offering you other than the leftovers of yet another passed holiday?
If you are thinking that I don’t know what I’m talking about, please pump the breaks. I do. I know all too well the pain of being the afterthought. I know what it means to think you are the smart one because you are getting the best of both worlds by being single and dating a married person or someone in a serious relationship because you have the freedom of not committing.
Truth is, you are and never will be in control of anything if you are constantly the one rearranging your schedule for theirs. You think you’ve got the upper hand because you won’t fall for their lies but you already have by settling to be second. If you think being second isn’t that bad then you really have no concept of self-respect. You will find it one day, maybe not next week or next month but one day. Maybe when you finally fall in love and another woman sidelines you.
There is nothing special about you. Let me rephrase that; yes, you are beautiful. Your body probably looks like a top model. But you still have two sets of lips in your pussy and bleed once a month like the rest of us so get over yourself and just sit back and listen for a bit.
People who cheat and manipulate others have serious issues. Once you stop giving them what they want you will realize just how little you truly mean to them.
It’s easy to tell yourself that you are in control because you have nothing to lose. You aren’t the one with the family or the one having to sneak around – but wait, you are. Sure, you could tell your close friends about sleeping around with someone who is taken but at some point in the back of your mind I’m sure you are thinking ‘are they judging me?’ Especially if they are in committed relationships themselves. You pose a threat to them. You can’t really talk about it on social media sites because what if someone knows that person and their cover is blown? That also means you can’t, or rather shouldn’t, take pictures and leave various forms of evidence of your time together because you don’t want to risk the possibility of getting ‘caught up’.
Do you see a trend on how this leave you a little isolated and lonesome? Most of your time together must be spent inside – and by inside I mean in the bedroom because that is all they really have time for with you. Their other obligations take up too much of their free time so all they have to give you are the few minutes or hours that they lied and said they were out at the store or working late.
Your life revolves around waiting for that phone call because you know their time is precious and they don’t get moments away often. You’d kick yourself if you missed out on a chance to spend time together. You become readily available at their convenience. Sure, you can prepare the nice candle light dinner and get the wine glasses ready, but they won’t have time for all of that. When they get their only one thing matters, and that is what is between your thighs. I ask again, who is in control?
Because you know that their significant other nags them constantly, you don’t want to ruffle their feathers by bringing up things that are questionable behavior or of importance to you. You suffer in silence. When or if you ever do bring up something in a casual voice, they get upset and turn it into a heated argument and question if you are in conspiracy with their spouse. What a crippling suggestion you think. The audacity to think that you would ever befriend or agree with such a heartless person. Then you begin to apologize; beg even. What was so important to you has now found its way to becoming nothing. Nothing if what you’ve become to them as well.
Have you ever tried to reason with a cheating person? They have perfected the art of manipulation so well that by the end of the conversation you will question your own self worth and identity. The cycle is unhealthy and repetitive. The part that you don’t realize is that you have everything to lose, not them. Usually their significant other or spouse knows about their indiscretion; it isn’t the first time. In these cases they won’t break up. They find reasons to overlook it and stay together, leaving you looking stupid, alone and used. Hopefully not with a child, STD or debt.
Occasionally, you find someone who does leave their spouse or significant other. These people fall into two categories; either they leave you the same way you got them or it actually works itself out. I have only heard of one story where it worked out, and even then it didn’t sound too realistic.
Being in the game is hard. It takes a certain type of person to navigate through the emotional territory unscathed. Having experienced by sides, I must say I prefer neither. So it becomes important to know the signs of a cheater, lest one becomes cheated….
The Pleasure Principles 
And what about when the other woman is also married? She can’t throw anything at him because she’s doing exactly the same thing. She is trying to trade up while her actions make both of them not worth a dime. And yes, she’s keeping it going. Because usually it’s the cheating wives who actually want to leave, not the cheating husbands.
This will be an ongoing blog feature so I will address that. Thank you for sharing!